” Parked In The Sun”
watercolor 15 x 22 inches
I have been lamenting for several weeks (months) that I have not been able to paint.
You might recognize the following if you have not been painting . . . . . .doubts and fears set in about whether I am reallty capable to do this . . . .was I just bee essing the world? . . . .was that last good painting an accident that I will never be able to repeat? . . . . .Have I lost the touch? . . . . . . .and more and more and more! All this pours through our consciousness as daily tasks take us from the easel. Soon, the doubts are so strong that we become nearly paralyzed. Not only that I ‘don’t‘ paint, but it becomes I ‘can’t‘ paint!
For an artist who gets grouchy and irritable when I don’t paint, the very sanity and comfort of those around me is at risk when long stretches between painting happen. It isn’t pretty. 😉
I have always preached to my classes to Just Paint ! Just go make a mess. Don’t worry about what, just make anything. . . . .but fer gooness sake, PAINT!
After a long, long break, something in me snapped. I rose from the bed yesterday absolutely committed to go make colored puddles on paper . . . . .to sling paint and just get used to the feel of it . . . .go ruin some paper, Mike! . . . .just practice what you preach! Forget all the mind chatter and get out there to move some pigment around.
So, I did. It isn’t up to the normal quality that I expect of myself, but that was not the goal. What a great feeling to throw something down with no expectations . . .just try something.
I have much to do in order to gain back my ‘touch.’ But. after yesterday, I am sure I can ‘come back.’
It’s good to be ‘home.’